Thankful for Christmas Break

Wow, Christmas break could not come at a better time. Although I had time off to be with my husband I am feeling drained. In fact, I'm feeling like I should change my career. I have never felt so underappreciated. It's such a strange feeling, but as a teacher you would think you would get a Christmas greeting or thank you, etc. but this year is the first year I felt a little jipped by my students. I was speaking with a friend who is also a teacher and she informed me that that's the reason she no longer bought her students presents. I had not realized that fifth grade was such a difference. In third grade I felt so appreciated by my students and their parents. Anyhow, this year, not so much.

Back to School...Back to School....

After over a week of vacation and hanging out with my husband, who is home on leave, I went back to school today. It was good. My "Yeller" has been officially unenrolled in my class and was taken out under police custody and cuffed in handcuffs. What a sight. It's really taken too long for this to happen, but hopefully where he is going they will be able to rehabilitate him. Two things stand out in my mind from today. Actually, two conversations.

1. "Mrs. Jones, are we ever going to meet your husband?" Student asked.
"Yes, you'll probably see him tonight at the Christmas concert. Why?" Mrs. Jones replied.
"Well, he must be a cool guy if you wanted to marry him," Students responds.

2. "Mrs. Jones, will you promise me something?" Student asks.
Mrs. Jones hesitantly replies,"Let me decide, what?"
Student begs, "Don't get pregnant and have a baby. Then you'll have to leave us again like Mrs. _____ did to her class. I don't think I can handle a sub again."

It was a pretty funny day today. I must admit I like this class so much. Although they have their moments where they drive me a little crazy and overwhelm me with their lack of know-how, they are such loving and wonderful students. I can only imagine how amazing they might be when they grow up.

Bloody Mess!

At the end of my day I was rushing to get out of school. However two of my students rushed into my room with a kid holding paper towels to his face. As soon as I looked up I noticed blood gushing out between his fingers. He had hit his head slightly on something and his bloody nose from the morning started up again. It was INSANE!! He moved the towel to show me and it was like a rushing stream! I threw on my gloves and grabbed some of those nose tampons. We rushed to the office without one drop spilling out onto the ground. I managed to clean him up a bit and stick a nose clog in. He bled right through it! Another one was soon bright red. It was quite a sight. Lucky for the office staff I am first aid certified. They were looking disguisted and I told them I'd finish taking care of it. It was pretty crazy. I felt like a mini-hero. =)

Papers, papers, papers..

I am so close to finishing grading papers. I wonder how people manage to get things graded so fast!? I hate having to sift through the writing and determine if they met rubric criteria. In fact, I think I need to do more true/false and multiple choice worksheets. That'd be awesome. But alas, I do not work that way...so I'm off to finish, so I can get them all inputed this week. Wahoo!!

Today...ah, today...

Today was such a funny day. Mostly because my students were really struggling with their D.A.R.E. essays and so I did a mini-essay on the board to show them how to answer the question and use a lead at the same time. Then somehow we went from talking to what D.A.R.E. has taught us to someone asking the questions, "When will your husband come home from Afghanistan? When will we get to meet him?" Another student added they really wanted to ask him questions about war.

"But we shouldn't ask him questions about war because Mrs. Jones might get sad and then cry," remonstrated another student.

Another student piped in, "Ya! I don't want to see Mrs. Jones cry!"

"Ya, that's so sad. I like her too much to see her cry. It makes me want to cry," another student chimed in.

"Mrs. Jones is sensitive. There's nothing wrong with that Mrs. Jones. I'm sensitive too," added, yet another student, to the discussion.

Several other students remarked thoughfully as well, but I was quietly laughing and grinning from ear-to-ear. Today I realized how much my class loves me back. It's a great feeling to feel loved back when you put so much time, effort, and money into lessons and into your classroom.

I also received such a wonderful email from a former parent. It makes me so happy to know that I made a difference in their child's life. My eyes literally welled up with tears as I read the email. All the struggles, all the screaming in my head, the gray hairs, and stress melt away when you get a note from a parent or student. It makes every little disaster feel like a learning experience instead of a catastrophe. It reminds me to continue to be dilligent, strive for perfection, be kind, be compassionate, be fair, and most importantly, be loving. This particular student taught me the importance of asking questions and using a calm voice before jumping to conclusions, like most adults do. He taught me the joy of playing jokes on parents (which he loved to do every day after school)...heheeheh... and patience. I learned a lot of patience, compassion, and unconditional love from my class last year. I know as the years progress, my students will make me a smarter, kinder, and a more wonderful person. I hope that all of my former students will always know how wonderful they are and that they too make a difference in my life. Thank you parents and students for changing my life as well.

I HATE GRADING PAPERS!!!

ARGH!!!! I have procrastinated a little stack of papers to grade....and now it's grown!! I have to get it done! I don't want to. It seems I will never have enough time in a school day to plan lessons, grade papers, prepare to teach, have PLC's, and teach.... AND pass AYP!?!?! Yowza!?!WHEN WILL THE MADNESS END!?!?!?! Until then, I'm off....too much to get done.....

Disappointment sets in....

THOUGHTS TOO JUMBLED....MUST SPIT THEM OUT!

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If you would have spoken to me over an hour ago you would have seen an extremely cheerful and excited person. However disappointment sets in.... Thursdays are my fabulously wonderful days, not only because I have extended prep, but because Thursdays are the days that I slip away to the magical land of golf. =) However it seems that Thursdays are unlucky days at Mountain Falls. The driving range manages to be closed on days I REALLY NEED TO WACK THE CRAP OUT OF SOMETHING. *SIGH* I have friends who are trying to make sure I don't over work myself any more and get me to leave work nearly on time. Today I did leave on time: 3:30 pm. It was a MIRACLE! Usually I work until the moon comes up and coyotes come out. This year I have friends who are getting me to have a life. THANKFULLY. They schedule exercise programs and golf to times really close to after school. This gives me no excuse to stay at school and melt into the walls of my classroom.

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I didn't sleep well at all last night. I have been so exhausted, I feel like I'm coming down with one of the millions of things my students have had. Sometimes I feel like my classroom is just a sesspool of germs. There are so many nooks and crannies to clean, it seems like an impossible task. My mind raced wildly last night, thoughts of the millions of undone tasks came to mind as I tried to throw myself into a much needed sleep: papers to grade, lesson plans for weeks to come, projects, house cleaning, church lessons, yard, brakes on my car, Thanksgiving plans, family complications, excitement for upcoming events....the list was endless. My mind is overactive and at times I'm completely ADD and/or ADHD, so I can relate to my students well.

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(Back to my day....)
I made the mistake (...or maybe right choice? Not sure yet.) and gave my "yeller" a journal. I that I thought that maybe he could write down some of his thoughts in it instead of yelling at people, and that maybe it would help him let go of his anger. I wrote that little message on the first page and placed it in his mailbox. Done. However it wasn't. Any normal student would just say thank you. Nope. Yeller isn't "any normal student." He didn't say thank you, instead, this conversation ensued:

Yeller: (without raising hand) Can I read what you wrote to me to the class?
Me: I don't think it's necessary to read it to the class, sometimes people write things to YOU and it's personal. It's not really necessary to share with everyone what happened yesterday.
Yeller: Can I show everyone what you wrote to me then?
Me: No. It's not appropriate. If you really feel like you need to share it, you can share it during your time at recess.
Yeller: But it's so cool, can't I show it to someone? (as he's passing it to ANOTHER person to read).
Me: You already are. Put it away.
Yeller: (putting it on his desk) Can I get people to sign it since I'm leaving?
Me: (Thinking: WHAT DID I DO!? THIS "KIND" GESTURE WAS A HUGE MSITAKE!!!!! When ARE YOU LEAVING??) One word: Recess.

*Silence* Yeller continues to carry the journal EVERYWHERE HE GOES. IT IS NOW A PART OF HIM.

WOW! I can't help but wonder if I made a total mistake!? Some kids just can't take a little attention and always have to be in the limelight! It's impossble to get teaching done at times like that. This year I have a lot of kids who constantly want to share experiences. I don't know if it's just me, or if all teachers experience it, but MAN! I constantly tell them, "No more personal experiences, I think it's great you all have so many stories that relate to erosion (or whatever topic we are learning about), but we are going to have to move on."

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I wonder if I'll ever be able to write lesson plans and complete them? It's been four years and I'm still horrible at pacing as I write up lesson plans. I always write more than can be accomplished, yet in my mind it seems totally feasible until I begin teaching. Then as I mark and scribble on my lesson plans I find myself wondering if others do the same thing. I've been really annoyed with my computer at home. I lost Word and so I have to do things over the internet in my email the past week. It's been painful, I can usually just copy, paste, or delete items in a document, but this week I've had to manually write in. ANNOYING!! I am way too dependent on technology.

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Students were horrible for the Librarian today. I don't know what to do with them. Well, I do know what I AM GOING TO DO WITH THEM. They're getting a library seating arrangement. They are just too chatty with each other. I ALMOST wish they didn't like each other so much! I can only imagine how the end of the year will be if this is happening in the beginning of the second quarter!!! YIKES!?

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Although I still get extrememly nervous for evaluations, I just tried to imagine she wasn't there today. Which helped me be more normal this first time. I did a typical writing lesson, introducing our next area of focus, leads/grabbers/hooks. I wonder if people plan lessons way out of the ordinary to be evaluated on? Maybe I should do that so I don't get so nervous of the critiquing of my everyday lessons. LOL...no, that would make me even MORE nervous, hehehehe. I guess I'll just continue to be borin'. Am I the only one who feels like this?

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Overall, today wasn't bad. It was pretty ok and I survived 5th grade yet another day.

Score: Teacher 1, Students 1